Here, drive this car, but we're not giving you an engine

My workplace is fairly small, headcount-wise. As one of the three individuals identified as being in a "supervisory" or "adminstrative" role, I frequently will have to deal with manager-level issues (especially when the boss is at a meeting or traveling.) I don't have a whole lot of experience doing this. Matter of fact, I didn't have any to speak of at all.

But, it's a great opportunity and a terrific company to work for, so I do the best I can. I make judgement calls when I need to, and do my best to keep an eye on the big picture. I also try to remember that I'm only filling in, I'm not in charge of the place.

A fact that the boss never misses an opportunity to remind me of.

Every judgement call and situation that I've tried to handle recently has been undercut, second-guessed, and/or neutered by the Boss after the trip is over. I tried to address a specific problem created by Mr. Annoying last week by employing some training that the company had paid for. I did the best I could under the circumstances, and walked out of The Talk with Mr. Annoying feeling like we were at least on the path towards improving the situation.

At least that's what he told me.

Turns out that he went and whined to the Boss about how bad I made him feel and how he was afraid of losing his job. Nevermind that I made it very clear multiple times that his job was not in jeopardy, and if it were we would be having a different conversation. Just like everything else, he heard but didn't listen to what I was saying. Several times in the conversation I would say something, and ask him to tell me in his own words what I meant. Needless to say, he had about 25% accuracy in even repeating exactly what I had said with no translation.

The Boss made all kinds of excuses for his behavior, and that the solution to the previous problems with him were to "let it go". If he wanted to hoard cards, that was fine. If he wanted to waste time in a meeting, that was fine. If he wanted to completely ignore what I asked him to do, to the point of me needing to repeat myself several times a day, I was told that that was what we would do.

So that puts me in the unenviable position of having responsibility without authority. I'm not asking for hire/fire rights or input on long-term decisions; I'm just asking that I not be thrown under the bus on a regular basis. I don't see how this is so unreasonable.

Today was a new low. In trying to be helpful and follow The Boss's previous instructions, I tried to share some information from my experience regarding a technical matter. The Boss didn't think that was appropriate in that particular context, and in hindsight, that was probably correct. Did The Boss take me aside and give me feedback? Nope. Reply to the email saying "that's not relevant to what I'm requesting, let's stay focused?" Nope. The Boss decided it'd be more effective to shout at me from halfway across the room, saying how my input wasn't wanted there. Did I mention all the users were within earshot?

In my shock and surprise, I got into a somewhat heated debate about the need for what The Boss was requesting in the first place, which was something that was not appropriate to discuss in that setting. Finally, I realized things were not constructive at that point, so I just said "OK", meaning I wasn't going to argue anymore, and we could move on. The Boss didn't let me. The Boss insisted on arguing with me after that.

So I let it go until lunchtime, at which point I approached The Boss to try to resolve the conflict. I indicated what I thought the problem was, admitted that I was wrong in what I did, and expressed a desire to resolve things. The Boss's reaction was to send me home.

Sent me home. After yelling at me in front of my co-workers. Because I had the nerve to try to defend myself.

I haven't lost my job, a point which The Boss emphasized (to the point of asking me to please come back the following morning.) However, The Boss's Boss is getting involved.

I should have just gone to The Boss's Boss in the first place.

Anyone else have a boss like this? Who's stated that they "don't believe in apologies in the workplace?" Who never hesitates to make you look like an idiot in front of your co-workers, but goes postal when you question something (even if it's your job to do so?)

I know the answer to that question, actually. There's lots of them. I just didn't think I'd find any of them where I am.